I guess I'm looking for support and to see if anyone else has a similar experience to discovering they are Bi-Sexual later in life, during their committed marriage & motherhood era 😂 Its a lot of me talking about my history and how I think I am. Sorry for the long post lol

I am a 35F. I am in a committed , healthy, and loving marriage to my 37M husband. We have been married almost 13 years and together almost 17 years. We have great communication, honesty, humor, laugh until we fall asleep sometimes, and I can't get enough 🍆 from him tbh 😅 We have 3 children and a beautiful little life we've worked really hard for. I am the luckiest most fortunate person to have this much love.

A few months ago, my husband casually said "Well yea, you're obviously bi, so that makes sense" in reference to something I said. It took me by surprise honestly. I asked him why he thinks that and he had good reasons. Two reasons, that I remember, are that I always find beauty in both men and women AND I can see myself having sex with a woman. True. His ex (16F at the time) was bisexual, but would hard core crush after other girls and eventually cheated on him with men and women. So he said he just recognizes some of the signs.

My best friend of 25 years is lesbian. She's even said to our other close friends "You are questionable with your sexuality", but she honestly didn't start saying that until I kept jokingly saying "I don't know, it's probably women for me next if my husband dies" and "Maybe I'm a little gay." We've never done anything, but another best friend I have I have ALWAYS seen myself being able to have sex with. She's straight as an arrow though lol

After a few years of thought I recently asked my husband if he would consider having a threesome with another girl and he said yes. He had a threesome as a teenager with his ex and while I was shocked when he told me 17 years ago (because I was still religious) I'm now thinking "Shit.. I want to do a threesome". Have been for a while, but I know that's a process and considered unicorn hunting. Unlikely we will ever find anyone anyway. However I am constantly thinking about it.

I didn't have signs of being bisexual when I was little, that I remember. A lot of you have posted those signs, but I don't think I had them. When I was 10 years old I drew people having sex in my diary (mortifying memory when my mom brought it up tbh). I do remember starting to get horny and thinking about putting 🍆 in my mouth, but also occasionally thought about licking 😽. Had zero access to pornography tho, so I think creative drawings and thoughts are how I dealt with the hormones. But growing up, I never knew there was any other options besides straight marriages or two men in relationships. Only because my third cousin is gay and I was used to him bringing partners around, but come to find out we have a few gay people in the family. Makes my heart happy. But yes, I had no idea lesbians or bisexual or anyone else of the 🏳️‍🌈 community existed until I was a teenager. Crazy lol

My bisexual awakening was a TikTok video of the girl who looks like Alex Vause from Orange Is The New Black 😂 She had a BBL, tattoos, was in underwear and bra, and was just shaking back and forth to "Shorty's got a big ol' booty". It got lots of likes and views, maybe you saw it! 😂

I'll never think it's appropriate to come out as a member of the LGBTQ community because my area is very VERY heavy on the types of religious communities who don't welcome people like that. I can come out to my friends over time, but only because it's a sexual preference for me that could casually come up in conversation. Not a marriage breaker or life changing fact that changes how I behave or treat others. My best friend of 25 years knows, but no one else does. Maybe that's okay.

I hope I'm not a monster who is sexualizing a beautiful community of 🏳️‍🌈 people for my own sexual pleasure. Maybe that's what I'm doing, and I'm not bisexual at all. Or maybe I'm bicurious. Maybe everything I've written is offensive, but I sure hope it's not because I have been a 🏳️‍🌈 allie since high school, even during my church days. I love everyone.

But this is the insane thought process that I've been wanting to share for a while and I'm hoping there's someone else out there who has had a similar experience or thought process 💗