Hi,

Two things happened in our marriage this last year. We gently opened up to non monogamy (wife had a boyfriend) and I [m42] recently came out as bi and had my first MM experience. Both things are lovely and nice.

Coming out made a big impact on me and how I understand myself. I feel more complete and want to share with friends. I can see myself coming out as bi, but have some reservations on the poly situation we're currently in. Somehow I feel some trepidation anwering questions like "and you have a boyfriend on the side, and so does your wife"? "doesn't that get messy?" "don't you get jealous?" "aren't you both sluts now?"

Obviously we're figuring this out as we go (we communicate a lot), but I feel like I will be cornered by such questions.

My bisexuality is much clearer and is accompanied with a lot of insight into my personality and well being. The non monogamy is not so clear, and I fear peoples stigma and judging.

How do you guys handle this?

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Are there people that never intend to act on their newly discovered same sex attractions?

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