Just looking to share how I’ve felt the last 3 weeks to a month as it’s felt like a very mixed and strange episode has been happening.

It started out with me starting to get more irritated, losing it at my spouse over little things and being an ass, losing it at minor inconveniences and just being so irritated.

But at the same time I’ve been mostly very happy feeling like a rockstar at work like I’m top shit and loving life.

But then I’ve also had intense bouts of depression mixed in there too with strong suicidal thoughts.

Been drinking compulsively been randomly going out for aimless drives late at night. My sex drive is through the roof been watching porn 1-4 times a day and caved into impulse spending on a cam site. Sometimes I’m aware other times I’m feeling in denial and that all is well.

Is this just typical hypomania or starting to shift into full on mania or just mixed or just being a normal person? I feel emotionally great right now