TLDR;So, it's been over a year of daily use and now I'm at a cross roads. Any advice on how to quit without completely destroying my stability.

👋. So I previously was an alcoholic (by medical definition, no health or social issues ever) and it was a bandaid that masked my symptoms before diagnosis as well as for the early stages of medication.

At the request of my medical team and family, I stopped drinking. We all knew the risks and it just wasn't worth it. The main problem though is drinking was my band-aid and without it I began to struggle again.

This was unfortunately a highly unstable part of my life as I needed to change providers twice and had multiple full medication changes (crap psych). Because of the problems I had without drinking I started smoking weed. First it started kinda sporadically with off label use of propranolol for anxiety. Then I realized that MJ is 900x better than propranolol at controlling my anxiety, ruminating thoughts, and uncontrollable fixations.

So it's been over a year now of near daily smoking and I'm having issues maintaining stability over the last few months. It started slowly and has been building to the point of it effecting my family.

I spoke with my psych team so I don't need in depth medical advice. They are adding abilify to my cocktail and will monitor over the next bit. But the shit part is they, rightfully so, want me to stop all drug/alcohol use until we find the right dosages and mix. I mean, they said forever so I told them that'll only be possible if they can offer actual stability.

So, for those of you who've done something similar. How can I stop smoking without risking my mental condition deteriorating? Sometimes the anxiety is so bad I physically feel it. Or I'm unable to accomplish what needs to be done.

They are sending me more propranolol and hoping it works better in conjunction with abilify until I'm stable on those pills but knowing it wasn't enough before, I'm nervous to continue worsening my condition.