I am straight up losing it. I have reached out to my medical doctor for a referral, I have called to set up an appointment with their behavior services myself and was repeatedly disconnected or sent to a phone tree with promise of being sent to a specific person with a name. I have emailed several other people, I have gone through every avenue that I can find on the internet.

With the world the way it is, I can’t just walk into a place and ask for an appointment, they won’t let me into the building. No one wants to respond to my email.

I am manic, I am having thoughts, and if this continues, I’m going to lose my job.

I don’t know how to get help because no one seems to want to help me. I can’t get admitted to a place because I won’t be making money and I would lose my home and even then, the last time I went there, all the responsibility of making future appointments was left to me. And while I should have done it then, I didn’t want to then. I want to now.

I don’t know what to do.