I feel stupid posting this but I'm at one of the lowest points in my life right now. I'll try to keep it short but it's complicated, so bear with me.

I've been with my husband for seven years (married for three). We used to have the perfect relationship, we always got along, it was easy. After we got married I would have doubts here and there, but nothing I felt wasn't necessarily normal. Things have crashed down around me in the last month or two. I feel so unhappy with our relationship (with a majority of my life as well to be fair).

Big things on my mind: there's about a 13 year age difference. I'm only 25. It feels like there's a lot of "been there, done that". When we first met, I was very anxious/awkward/introverted. I was homeschooled, didn't have many friends, so it would always just be us. I've changed a lot, especially in these last two years. I have friends now, I like to go out and socialize, but he has no desire to. He has no hobbies, no genuine friends in the area. We've talked about it. He's adamant about not wanting to go, but at the same time, I feel like he tries to guilt me when I do go without him.

I'm torn between whether I'm truly unhappy with him or that I'm having a case of FOMO. I know the grass isn't always greener on the other side. But I feel like I'm far too young to be feeling this way. I feel like I don't know who I am without him. I moved out of my parents house and in with him. I want to be my own person, but the thought of being alone is also terrifying. I'm terrified of sticking it out and waking up ten years from now, in the same situation or worse. I don't want to waste away in a relationship and stay because it's comfortable like my parents did.

The reason I'm posting this here is because I was recently diagnosed bipolar. Grasping at straws here, but do you think there's any chance my feelings are stemming from that, and maybe the feelings aren't as real as I think they are? This is what scares me - I'm so afraid of ending things or taking a break and ruining the best thing I've ever had solely because my headspace was fucked up. I want to wake up and be happy again with him. That's all I want.

I've started taking lamictal (third week in) and I feel like my mood swings have regulated a bit, but my feelings regarding our relationship don't really change. I'm also seeing a therapist. She says couples counseling is an option but she agrees it seems to be more of a me wanting more out of my life type of deal, and I don't know if that's fixable. There's plenty more to be said, but this is already ridiculously long. Just a sad girl looking for some insight.