Wanting tk reach out and ask how others have coped and dealt with the aftermath of their episodes. I am recently diagnosed as of mid August this year. My family has been great and I’ve gotten the help and support I need from them, but Iim having trouble mebtally because of what happened with my friends, and also my relationship.

This summer for the 4th of July me and my girlfriend traveled to WI to visit with all of my buddies, ab 7-10 different people. The first couple days were awesome, it was sm fun being able to visit again, and also meet some new guys. But as the week proceeded, I became extremely overstimulated, could not sleep, and would he up for 25 hrs at a time. I started lashing out and was extremely irritable but I wasn’t sure why. I went into a clean freak state and started tidying up the entire house while everybody would be asleep. I got into so many fights with my gf, and my friends. They would try to pull me aside privately and have a conversation but it wouldnt’t work and I’d go back to my irrational self. It was awful, I felt terrible and just wanted my old self back.

Almost a week into the trip one night me and her continued to argue and i picked her up off the couch and shoved her away from me. I have never ever laid hands on anyone let alone a partner, and instantly regretted it. That night she broke it off with me and I can totally respect that. Days before this I also punched in the host’s bathroom door during a panic attack. I dont think it helps that I was drinking and smoking during this bout.

Fast forward a month or so, I have another episode at work, I was a 3rd shift security guard and was trying to get a vendor to leave the premises, but he felt threatened and called the cops, when they arrived i had taken my shirt off, and didnt have shoes on. I ended up agreeing to go to the hospital where i was admitted overnight, and then transferred to a behavioral health unit the next day.

Right now im still devastated, bc of my disorder I lost my friendships, relationship, and my job. Im trying to make amends with my friends but nobody is willing to talk to me.