I have done every job EVER. And I mean every job.

If I become good at the job, I end up bored and quit because I think “my potential isn’t being reached” and do something else or I blow up at somebody at work for “bossing me around” and I say something absolutely vile to them. Or I get involved with somebody at work and have a whole romance drama. Or I am bad at the job so I go into a crying fit, dramatically exit and threaten to do something drastic in front of everybody and blame them for making me feel that way. Then I go into a depressive episode for awhile before I get antsy and get another job.. Every year I have 6 tax forms of 1099s and W-2s.

I bring SO MUCH drama to the workplace. I feel kind of bad bc these places don’t know how insane I can get. When I get hired I’m in my delightful period of mania.

I rack up debt on credit cards during the time period where I don’t have a job, then I get a job and pay it off, then I quit/get fired again, then I am broke again.

And yes, I’m on meds. I’m on 4 a day. Apparently it’s not enough. I’m tired of the pills. I’m tired of hoping it gets better. I’m tired of everything. I’m wondering if I’m just meant to be batsh** crazy and hop around my whole life bc being stable is just not working for me no matter how much effort I put in to be normal.