I’m a longtime lurker around here so obviously I’ve always been aware that I am “blessed,” but this weekend, I am embarrassed to admit that at 35 years old, I let curiosity get the best of me… 📏🍆

I hear your doubts. What guy hasn’t tried? You’re right. I had measured my manhood before, but that was years ago… and my body has changed a lot since then.

Most of my adult life I was hovering around 250 pounds, and I had measured myself and knew I was over 6”. In January 2021, I weighed the heaviest I ever was at 315 pounds and that was when I started my weight loss journey.

These days, I hover about 155 pounds. I’m literally half of the person I used to be. I had read all the stuff online about how it would get longer as the fat pad shrunk, and visually, I definitely could see results over the past few years. But I never confirmed my suspicion.

I think I enjoyed the plausible deniability when women asked. “I haven’t measured, your guess is good as mine.” I usually would say, “well I’m above average for sure” when pressed on it.

So, embarrassingly, I let curiosity and insecurity get the best of me. I pulled out the tailor’s tape and measured along the top, just as I’d read online, pressing against the bone. I even looked up the numbers again online to see what was currently considered “average.”

And less embarrassingly, I can finally admit that it’s not just above average. It’s just long. Thank you for your time.