So a bit of background. In 2019 I went zero contact from my entire biological family because I just had enough of toxic elements. Eventually I moved away from where they live. Fast forward, to now i have a 4 month old and as far as i know none of my bio family knows. It's just my husband's family who live in the same county as they do. So as the holiday approaches, I've been kind of blue, the holidays arent the same, especially with covid. To the point I kind of want to send an ornament/photo to family with the idea they can get their hearts ripped up like they did to me ( no return address). Petty.....yeah....but really why TF do I think about it? I'm not the type of person to do that. I kind of was crushed to see " Grandma's First Christmas" even tho my bio mother betrayed me in many ways. Have parents with toxic parents of thier own thought this way? Is it covid messing with my experiences or something more? Is this normal for new parents who went zero contact with thier parents?