tl;dr - I'm missing someone who treated me like shit, changed everything about me, humiliated and hurt me and I'm feeling pathetic.

I started college a few years late and was having trouble in my math class, so posted for a tutor. Nobody ever bothered to pay attention to me and in hindsight it was so easy to see how I fell for it all. Even that first night it felt like there was something, I've never been a skinny girl, even as a kid but whenever she looked at me it made my guts quiver. Over days and weeks she spent more and more time in my apartment, since I wasn't in the dorms, she sort of moved in though she didn't really ask, just staying nights. She started with teasing, playful names, touching, working up to more. she took my virginity. Our relationship evolved over the weeks, I started doing more chores around the house, learning what it was to be her submissive. Months go by and it was allot of things she said she enjoyed, body writing, humiliation play, she started larger and larger toys. All sorts of things I won't mention here because it's just embarrassing how much I did for her.

She was my first everything and after six years of... Everything... she tells me she's leaving me for a guy she's been dating for a year. That was two years ago now and today is her birthday, I'm sitting here ~~with a little cake, crying, ~~ the stupid little cake is in ruins, and because I miss her and everything we did. I guess I'm looking to talk.

This is even more awkward posting this here now since nobody cared about the first post tonight.