Looking for any support or advice on benzo medication management/psychiatrists and tapering. I was put on Ativan in 2020 for panic disorder as needed but my doctor was prescribing me 30/month, but I never took them daily and usually would take half.

Fast forward to now, I’ve changed insurances and I’ve been looking for a new provider on medi-cal, where I’m lucky if any of them even answer the phone. I just had one doctor tell me flat out he will not take me on that dosage even though I told him I’m willing to taper. My primary gave me a temp refill but told me he won’t be able to continue.

I’ve been able to stretch them but I’ve also had a lot of trauma/panic inducing events lately and extremely afraid of withdrawal and seizure. I don’t know what to do, I’m feeling so hopeless and scared and it’s only making my anxiety worse.

Any support is much appreciated. 🤍 Please no judgement. I’m aware that this can be a dangerous medication and they really cracked down on psychs prescribing it, but at the time when I had started I did not know all of this and it feels so scary to have a medication that has helped you live your life taken from you with no compassion or medical management. With the added fear of the very real dangers of stopping cold turkey.