Happy Monday, /r/baseball!

11 months and 3 weeks ago, we began a fantastic journey together that would culminate in the creation of two new teams in our beloved Major Leagues - the Montreal Phenix and Carolina Pilots. I'm happy to report that both teams met with overwhelming support from new (and in the case of Montreal, old) fans and despite not performing quite as impressively as their surging fanbase would hope, they're well on their way to success in the future (if they can get through the Mets, but I digress).

The experiment was so impressive and successful (and lucrative), in fact, that the Commissioner of Baseball Mr. Bud "Don't Call Me "Bud"" Selig himself sent me a letter asking if we could do it again this year. I'm more than happy to oblige.

So without further ado, I'd like to lay down the ground rules for this year's franchise creation!

Last year, both Carolina and Montreal topped the voting, which means they are banned like toast at a Celiac convention (because let's be honest, even gluten free bread is generally pretty bad). And because Mr. Bud "Don't Call Me "Pal" Either" Selig, Honorable and Gracious King of Baseball decreed that his favorite team didn't make it, The Moon has been eliminated from contention like the Texas Rangers back in July.

THAT BEING SAID

Yes, the Moon is out. But this year, the franchise locations aren't limited to the a country, continent, planet, universe, even dimension. Major League Baseball is accepting applicants from any reality - ours, a movie's, a tv show's, a book's, an album's, a painting's, anyone's - so long as they dot their i's and cross their t's. And really, that's not too much to ask as long as you're literate. And have limbs. And know what i's and t's are.

The Great and Invenerable (is that a word?) Fearless Bounty Hunter Captain of Baseball, Mrs. Bud "Don't Call Me "Weiser"" Selig herself has gone so far as to allow, if you are so creatively endowed (which she is not, and she reminds you all, is alternatively well-endowed), entries to be narratively or otherwise constructed as long as they adhere to the following guidelines and present the required information.

PLEASE NOTE THAT THE FRANCHISE CREATION PROCESS IS SLATED TO BEGIN NEXT WEEK, MONDAY, NOVEMBER 10TH, 2014. ENTRIES SUBMITTED TODAY WILL NOT BE CONSIDERED.

THE FRANCHISE ENTRY FORM

Item 1: Location

• "Location", as stated in the Form, shall unless otherwise explicitly explained be considered to be of the current prevailing universe, in which Earth is the third planet from the Sun and no alien contact or supernatural/superhuman powers exist except those allegedly possessed by Giancarlo Stanton.
  • TL;DR - If your location isn't from this world and reality, explain where it is located (like what book/tv/movie it's from)
• "Location" shall include a succinct synopsis of the peoples expected to both participate in the sport and participate in the fandom of the sport.
  • TL;DR - Describe the type of people that live there, and if they're not of this world, explain what type of being would play baseball and how they'd do it.

Item 2: Unique Features and Benefits

• This is a more interpretive section, where the bidder is asked to list or explain what their particular location offers that would be unique from any location currently hosting a Major League Baseball team, as well as what benefits the teams (both home and away) and MLB themselves would gain from the location being chosen.

Item 3: Bribes and/or Gifts

• In this section, bidders offer a token of appreciation to The Stupendous and Frabjous Mr. Bud "Just Call Me "Bond"" Selig, a necessary part of the application process. While all gifts are accepted, for those offering monetary considerations, please PM /u/_depression for where to send your most gracious gift.

**Item 4: Anything Else Not Covered in the Application"

• Or "AENCitA" for short. It really rolls off the tongue!

A REMINDER AGAIN WHILE I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, THE BIDDING PROCESS BEGINS NEXT WEEK, MONDAY, NOVEMBER 10TH, 2014. ENTRIES SUBMITTED TODAY WILL NOT BE CONSIDERED.

And with that, I wish you all a good night! Please enjoy the rest of your day, and feel free to use the comments below this article to express your excitement, speculation, and plans for bidding for next week! Don't forget to like, favorite, and subscribe to my YouTube channel if you want more videos of me playing DDR and Super Smash Bros! You can also Follow me on Twitter, Like me on Facebook, Reblog me on Tumblr, 1 me on Google Plus, Hire me on LinkedIn, and Rate me in the Google Play or iOS App Store!