There’s an inner radar within you that reminds you when self care is being called to you. Looking towards intimacy, validation, the illusion of having something, acquisitions that aren’t really needed, excess food, stimulation, or sex. Once you’ve done self love then you will realize that you aren’t separate from the feeling that any externalizations bring out because they are created/surfaced by you. Heart says, why would you need a key (object) for a door (Love) with no locks (limiting beliefs). Everything in modern structured civilization has a price, THE real deal, love, is as free as breathing air. A small circle of desires helps keep you in contentment, the less the better, less is more, having so many that are out of reach creates unfulfilled wants and a sense of lack.