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What's the appropriate way to dance with approaching women?
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So I'm (M31) practicing raving solo after going through a tough break-up. To all you solo ravers: you guys are awesome and so brave. Dancing alone has honestly been really tough for me. It's pretty scary if I'm being honest.

I've gone to a few shows solo recently and women will approach me and start trying to dance with me, and I freeze up. There's so many things going through my head. Do I talk to them? Do we just dance silently and vibe with the music? How do I dance with them? I do appreciate the interest a lot of times, but I don't know what to do with myself. I'm a MAJOR proponent of enthusiastic consent and respect every person's body autonomy, so I don't really know what to do when women get closer. I don't want to assume they want to be touched so I don't even when they're clearly hitting on me or starting to grind. The few times I've asked "is this okay?" they think the question is weird. So after a few minutes of me not touching they tend to leave. I'm open to making new connections or even just rave flirting or sexual chemistry or whatever but I get really paranoid that I'm being awkward because I don't know how to engage. Doesn't help that I'm in my head about my break-up. It's like I've lost all sense of confidence and game and don't know how to flirt any more. Also as a side note, I dress very metro and am consistently mistaken for being gay, so I think sometimes women are confused on how to approach me too.

TL;DR: How do I handle approaching women in a RESPECTFUL way that still shows I'm interested in advances?

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1 year ago