So I am a ND mom of an amazing 13 yr boy who has Autism and ADHD. One of our biggest issues is that when we get into a discussion about consequences for his actions or any other behavior. He refuses to see any one elses point of view and insists that they or I am not listening. How do I help him understand that just because I or they dont agree doesnt mean I am not listening. Second question his special interest is gaming. How can I help him realize he cant play 24/7 without causing a meltdown. And lastly his great grandfather passed away a few months ago. They were very close. He seems like it doesnt bother him but he stems more and has frequent shutdowns that he wasnt doing before how can I help him through his grief. He will say little things and do little things that shows its affecting him.

Edit: Thank you guys for all the great advice. You gave me alot of ideas and a different perspective. I want my sweet guy to be the best him he can be and I just want to give him all the tools and support that I can.