Wow, that's a tabloid title! Anyway. After almost two decades of being pushed away with increasing force (most of it is in my post history), I finally had enough. I told my husband things would have to change, or I would leave. It did not have the desired effect. After almost two years of him trying to appease me and then growing resentful because it didn't help, of him being nervous around me and taking pretty much anything I said as criticism, of him not doing or saying almost anything at all because he was afraid of getting it wrong... I finally realised that I can't trust him with my feelings. He has more than enough trouble just handling his own. So I told him that even if I had tried to make myself want to be close to him again, I just can't do it. I don't trust him enough to be in a romantic relationship with him.

It took some time for him to take this in. He said that his biggest fear was not getting to see his kids every day. So we still live together, take care of the house together, coparent... And it's so pleasant! He's so relaxed! He does a lot more around the house, spends more time with the kids, plans and organises stuff (he has never done that before), he's even less afraid to spend money. He's just... happier and more energetic!

I know this probably can't go on forever (even though I feel so broken from this relationship that I can't really imagine a romantic relationship with anyone ever again), but for now, I am enjoying the peace and harmony.