For context: In 2018, I was hit in my right eye with a hard tennis ball (the red ones) and there was internal bleeding, cornea aberration and more horrifying things. I was somehow saved from near blindness and I thought all my problems was over.

Unfortunately, in 2020, when covid hit and everything turned online and I bought a MacBook Pro and started using it for my online classes. Within minutes after using it/even staring at it gave me immense eye strain (so severe that the side-effects included a headache that stayed for a week.) After 2 weeks I decided to just get a 10 year old that had the worst display in today’s standard but the best suited for my eyes and it worked fine.

As I am heading for college this fall, I thought of upgrading my tech. So I purchased a gaming laptop with 144Hz display and all my problems suddenly returned. Went to the eye doctor and he said nothing is wrong with my eyes and gave me new set of glasses to wear. (He does know I was severely injured but I don’t know if he remembers it.)

I’m very worried that this issue might set me apart from the rest of my peers. I get a headaches even after looking at a TV screen in my home. Doing some research online (although my parents heavily advised against seeking medical info online) I found out that this issue might be due to astigmatism.

What do I do now? If anyone’s experienced such a situation before please help me out. I’ve stopped playing video games with my friends, I’ve stopped learning to code and program on the side (despite learning it since the past 6 years) all because of this. My life suddenly feels upside down and anyone I talk to thinks I’ve gone crazy and wouldn’t want to talk to me about it.

I’ve talked about this problem with my dad and he is sending me away to a therapist because he thinks I’ve become too afraid psychologically.