I had a therapy session today and we were talking about this and everything else. But, honestly I was just really distracted and was out of it.

Though it's nothing we haven't gone over before she just says distract yourself and try to examine these thoughts etc.

It's really just so frustrating. I just don't want to feel it anymore just so ugh.

I could reach out to her but she's just going to tell me the same things same with any one else. I'm in groups and discords and have friends etc. But I feel like talking about this stuff just annoys people hell people here will down vote .

There's all the suggestions on what to do but I don't really want to watch or listen to anything. And a walk right now is not a thing I can do. I'm not going to kill myself though and I'll continue to feel miserable.

I just want to work up to it and get it over with then I don't have to think about it anymore. Like sure people will be sad for a time I guess but then they move on. My therapist was like "Well I don't think so, it's not something you get over blah blah." But you can't grieve forever sure it might be sad to think about or whatever but people eventually move on and forget.

I just need something to make it go away. I hate this and myself.