So I (38ftm) regularly attend trans-inclusive adult play parties. When I attend I am usually the only ftm, but I don’t mind. I just love attending to get my needs met.

I have always been friendly with everyone at the events and I even thought I was making friends with a bunch of the trans women.

Well the last two events, I couldn’t shake this feeling that all the women were giving me the cold shoulder. Later on I asked one of them what was going on and she told me that a bunch of the trans women don’t like me because they say I steal all the men from them.

And a few of the more passing women, really really don’t like me because I have not had top surgery yet (I am planning to in 2025 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼), but they also don’t like the trans women that are at the beginning of their journeys. The criticism from the women that have had the most surgeries seems like bs because every has their own gender goals AND every one has to start somewhere. You don’t automatically wake up fully “transitioned” whatever that means.

But anyway, I’m so sad to find out this information. I really like the women in my community AND I want to be in community with them… I’m not sure if that makes sense. I am not competing. At these adult parties it’s about having consensual fun, and I want everyone to have a good time.

I’m really sad that my actions are being taken negatively..

I don’t know what to do next. Any advice?