TLDR: Struggling with being trans(?), struggling not to tell family despite not being certain yet, need advice on how to stay sane..

Since I've started 'scratching the scab' of my gender identity, something is happening to me.

I've shaved off all my body hair, including my beard.. this especially brought the attention of family and friends who started asking questions and it's really stressing out.

Deep down, I think I've realised I'm trans, certainly after a chat I had with a trans friend the night before last. We compared experiences and such and.. yeah.. she's given me some tablets (perscription, so I'm not planning on taking them, certainly not until I know if I can) that helps grow the hair on your head while thinning the rest. Which I felt very affirmed by.

I'm struggling to keep my mind off of all this. I want to tell my family especially, so i could feel like im not lying or hiding something, but I can't bring myself to do so unless I am certain. I have an appointment with a professional toward the end of Jan, I plan on bringing up the meds aswell.

How do I stay sane until then? 😔