Apologies mods, I didn't see any rules I might break with this but please remove if its not okay to post.

I made a comment to this post https://www.reddit.com/r/Transgender_Surgeries/comments/128iyhy/trans_womentransfemmes_who_have_had_bottom/

and it got a lot of very sweet positive responses so I figured I'd post it in a couple more places since it seemed to resonate with people.

The question was, what was it like after surgery and any advice for someone 1.5 months on HRT.

I'm 5 weeks post op. Life is slowly getting back to normal. Dilation is 3 times a day for 30 minutes and boring/annoying af because it's a fairly good chunk of my day but otherwise nothing special. Dilation will continue for a year before slowing down, check my profile for more info.

I get up, I go downstairs, I have coffee. I go out to eat, I hang with friends. I'm a little slower still and am more careful with myself buf I feel like 75-80% at the moment.

As far as special forms of cleaning, I shower every morning after first dilation and wash my vagina with soap, outside not inside, and then the last dilation of the day gets a steroid cream out inside me with a tampon which I sleep in. The steroid cream will likely stop shortly.

I'm upto the 2nd biggest dilator and hoping to be on the biggest next week.

As far as things that are different. I dunno you kind of get used to it. There's still so many new experiences, my pussy blows bubbles sometimes, air escapes through wetness on my pussy and it feels weird. It's harder to hold my pee, putting on panties feels great cause they fit. There's tons of new sensations and feelings. But it becomes mundane. Right now I'm waiting until I'm more healed so I can do sexual stuff. That's what im looking forward to.

I do spend a lot of time complaining about various things to cis girls and they are all nodding as I'm talking because we've all been through the same things and that's so incredibly validating. I love it.

As far as advice for you...

1.5 months is so early. Hrt has barely begun to effect you, im going on 12 years. The first two years are the hardest. It's not only hard to deal with emotions that seemingly come from nowhere but the entire way you interact with the world has been flipped on its head. How do you dress? How do you talk to other people? What are your mannerisms? Do you wear makeup? Should you do voice training? Do people see you as a girl?

It's hard. It's a period of self discovery along with a huge amount of being unsure of yourself. Scared. Self conscious. You make mistakes, such as a fashion choice but it gets better.

I don't know how old you are but If you're an adult, think about it like you're a 14yo girl who's trying to discover herself and be kind to yourself. It takes time for teenagers to get out of that awkward phase. To figure out what they want, who they are. I thought I was agender for many years until I gave myself permissions to be Femme for instance. As I said the first two years are the hardest, but it gets better. But do give yourself permission to experiment.

Try makeup, try new clothes, do you like goth clothes or heels or dresses? What makes you feel good? Try new hairstyles, grab a wig, try new ways of moving, new mannerisms. Embrace the awkward.

Your emotions are all over the place, just remember, not all feelings have a cause. Just because you feel a specific way doesn't mean you need to assign a reason to it. Hormones do that sometimes. Sit back and ask yourself, Is there a reason to be sad? And sometimes the answer will be no and you can go, "damn hormones"

You'll probably be obsessed with trans stuff and that's okay, find some friends. Make a support system. Make sure you have people to talk to. For me the desire to exist in trans spaces died after a few years as i wanted to be stealth and being trans hadn't taken over my life anymore. Cause it will take over your life. Remember, put yourself first always. Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. Do you what you need to do to be okay.

Right now being trans is probably the only thing you can think of but in a few short years it'll be just another piece, like being a gamer. It'll be boring and honestly thats nice. I dunno about you but I just want to fade into the background as just another normal boring girl. That's all I ever wanted.

Hormones are going to change your body, it's nearly impossible but try not to compare yourself to other women. Your body and theirs aren't the same, your body is yours, theirs is theirs. It's going to be different from everyone else. Focus on things you love about it. Relish the changes. Feel your body. Touch it and think "wow, my skin feels way softer, that makes me feel like a girl and I love it." share your excitement with others. You'll feel disappointment at some changes not happening fast enough or not happening enough at all, you'll look in the mirror and not see yourself sometimes. But focus on those days where you see the girl in the mirror. It'll happen and it's the greatest feeling in the world when you look in the mirror and finally see yourself. Remember you can't control what hormones do to you, but you can control how you react to it. Plus if you're really unhappy, there's surgery for most things. I didn't like the size of my boobs for instance, 36b and so I got surgery and am now a 36dd. Feels great.

Speaking of surgery. Take your time. Remember that you don't need a soul crushing amount of dysphoria to get surgery. You only need one thing: to want it. For me srs wasn't life saving, I wasnt going to die. But I wanted a vagina. I preferred it over a penis, so I got it. That's enough. You don't have to justify yourself to anyone (except maybe doctors but fuck em). Also you know, research the hell out of everything.

Remember this very important thing. If I could give you one piece of advice it's this:

You can be any type of girl you want.

Tomboy, high Femme, androgynous, goth, punk, preppy, egirl, anything. Have a beard, don't wear makeup, wear exclusively dresses, tons of makeup, wear heels or don't. You get to choose. All those girls you spent years wanting to be? They got to choose too. It's your turn. And it won't be the same forever. The type of girl you are will change over your life and that's okay but take the time to figure out who you are and what you want.

Be kind to yourself. This isn't an easy journey and it's by no means short but it does get easier and it is worth it.