I don’t drink so I’m not comfortable going to bars or clubs anymore. I have a high sex drive and I think it’s healthier to have sex with men when I am in the mood rather than just lock myself away in my bedroom doing the job myself multiple times a day.

So what happens is that I get in the mood then go on like three different apps and circle the drain and then don’t end up actually doing anything for an hour or more. Back and forth conversations that go nowhere. I think of the bad hookups I’ve had and get choosy. The time flies by because there’s multiple conversations going on at once. This leads to other compulsive behaviors with my phone like spending hours online watching YouTube videos or whatever.

I need help with this. I want to meet my sex drive in a way that leads to greater connection with other men, but right now my approach seems to be leading to me spending hours on my phone. I’m slowly building up some regular fwbs but it’s only a few and does not meet my needs. Masturbation is a solution but I know it’s only a bandaid since that’s not entirely what I’m seeking here.

Have any of you guys gone through this, worked on it, and found solutions? What’s worked for you? The services are great as tools but also have intentionally addictive design so it’s a double edged sword every time I use them.