Tldr: I’m getting insecure about a hotter guy I met for a few dates, he’s not a texter, but active on social media. I’m opposite and a bit of a loner. His silence between meets bothers me the most, but I don’t want to blow it. What to do?

We met on Grindr of all places and started chatting about shared kinks first, but then he mentioned looking for a relationship and I was like „yeah, I’d like a relationship”. We both have some ltr experience and been single for 1 years. First date was a rather silent walk, but pleasant. Second date were cuddles, drinks and film, I spent a night at his. Third was at mine, but he didn’t spend the night and I got slightly upset, but apparently he struggles to sleep outside of his bed. Chemistry seems to be there though - I could feel his heart beating fast when we cuddled.

Anyway, we are both pretty socially awkward me (34) even more than him (32), so our conversations aren’t perfect and I think we’re both quite guarded. Despite that we’re both geeky, openminded and have weird rituals. I’m extra careful I guess because I feel like he’s way out of my league (taller, more muscular, cuter face, even more experienced with kink). He keeps talking about his accomplishments etc, I just ask questions, sometimes say something about myself but largely stay silent. On top of that, he’s very active on social media and seems to have a decent circle of good looking and well-to-do friends, which I don’t. Currently I only have one friend I see regularly.

I think about him a lot. I tried messaging a few times between meets but those conversations are very short and he takes time to respond. Which is weird given his work gives him a lot of free time and he keeps posting on social media. Sometimes he doesn’t even respond to messages which aren’t clear questions.

We haven’t had sex yet, didn’t even kiss - which is fine, but I have this nagging feeling that he’s just trying to get back into dating and I’m his training ground or something. He asks very few questions about my life etc.

I guess my question is how can I test the waters? We only met 3 times so far. I don’t want to come across insecure, but also don’t want to jump the other direction.