So - I've been dating a new guy for about a month now and we like each other. I accept that he's had a sexual past with hookups, bath houses, etc. Most people have some sort of sexual past as do I. He has asked me more than once if I want to watch a video of him having sex with someone from his past. More than once in the past week, I gently told him I'd rather not see the video.

Tonight, he was sitting on my sofa and started to play a sex video and I could tell that it was his voice in the video. I again told him I don't really want to see (or hear) that sort of video. It's just not how I want us to relate at this point in our relationship as we're getting to know each other and build trust. I also raised concerns around consent - i.e. does the person in the video know that it would be shown to someone else, especially with someone you're trying to pursue seriously?

Don't get me wrong - voyeurism is not outside of my imagination but it will take me some time to build trust and time to build up toward that if I ever do.

He also tries to continuously test my willingness toward introducing a "third" because he always wants to top (I don't always want to bottom) or going to bath houses but that's not how I want to show up at this point in our relationship.

Edit: He is also a weed smoker/edible eater. I do not use mainly because I don't like the trip and I am not supposed to use marijuana products because of my security clearance. He asks me often if I want to partake with him and I constantly have to push back even though he tries to keep it light and joking.

Should I take a step back from him? Right now, I'm trying to see how he pushes my boundaries and it seems like he tries to push a bit too much.