I (31 M) struggled with my sexuality for most of my life and felt pretty alone despite having friends at many points while growing up. I never pictured myself being in a relationship because of battle with my sexuality. It was either hookups or friends.

I will say being tall, relatively attractive, and masculine makes it easy to attract but not necessarily when it came to a connection. And in recent times, I’ve been curious about not just dating but finding love.

Somehow through manifestation, I found a man is exactly my type . Like I don’t know where to begin when it comes to all things about him I love. We’re very affectionate, and lovey dovey with each other but also enjoy the friendship we have through it.

My feelings for him have gotten pretty intense, but recently I’ve cooled off on him in a healthy manner- there was too much hyperfixation/obsession.

Even though it’s only been 4 months, I know I love him. I’ve never felt this way about a guy before. I tell him I love him all the time. But he makes it clear that he doesn’t love me yet - he’s moving cautiously out of protecting his feelings. He’s very intentional when it comes to me, but he’s not gonna say he loves me if it’s not true. Which I respect and prefer.

But it does feel weird love bombing him and not receiving that verbal reassurance in return. But I get it.

It’s also worth noting we’re both bottoms- and I feel like he’s worried I might leave him for a top. Yesterday while we were flirting he said “you’re not gonna break my heart are you?” That question made me so sad . I’m big empath and just want to see my baby happy and satisfied. The idea of hurting him hurts me :/. Regardless we’re in a good space, even though it’s still so new and fresh. Here’s to growing, learning, and loving.