I was having a chat with my friend who says he is undateable in the area he lives in because of the gay preferences there, but does very well in his home country (for dating). So he settles for hookups in his current area while travelling to his hometown for something more serious.

I am curious for those who struggle to date, but can get hookups, what did you learn overtime and how do you manage this for yourself?

My sense is the bucket of guys who will hookup with you is generally 'larger' than those who will date you (assuming you meet a certain level of attractiveness/fitness etc), so I'm curious what you learned about yourself through this process, if it ever improved for you, what actions you took (e.g. moved location, therapy, tried dating friends, drugs etc) and so on?

Note: I'm less interested in the "reason" of why you think you are single, more interested in how you are managing it and/or plans for the future knowing this information.