Originally, I wanted to find a friends-with-benefits (FWB) situation so I could experience being a bottom. My biggest problem has been that I’m not attracted to guys—just their dick, and maybe the mentality of being overpowered or dominated. After using a dildo for a while, I wanted more.

So, I took the step of looking around on Grindr, hoping to find something trustworthy with just one person, in case I liked it. I started looking for an FWB and decided that for now, I only want to do it with one person.

After a few days on the app, I met a guy who told me he was in an open relationship with his girlfriend, and they were looking for a third. After talking for a while, he seemed nice and trustworthy, so I took another leap and asked if we could keep it exclusive as FWBs between the three of us.

Now I’m really excited but also nervous because I’ve never done anything like this before. I’m trying to figure out how to approach the first few meetups. Ideally, I’d like to meet them both casually at first and maybe go to their place on the second meetup, and if all goes well, we could move forward from there. But I’m nervous about how to break the ice, especially in this kind of situation. I also worry that the girl might not like me or that the vibe could be off.

Weirdly enough, I think I’d feel more at ease with a girl there, but I’m still unsure of how to navigate everything. If anyone has advice on how to handle the first few meetups or how to ease into it, I’d really appreciate the tips!