I'm (28M) pansexual, polyamorous, and I'm dealing with 2 boyfriends (I'll call them #1 and #2).

1 (27M) is a masc alpha, and #2 (35M) is a masc man as well, who only crossdressed one time, in a photo online. I have no problem with #2 crossdressing (in fact, I find it attractive, since femboys are beautiful, just like masc men are; but there are obviously people who would disagree with me).

1 sees the photo of #2, and misgenders him (him being #2).

I was quick to scold #1 because he was obviously disrespecting #2, when they have more in common than they realize - but a few weeks later, someone made me consider a very correct truth: that #1 is jealous of #2's autonomy and free will to be androgynous.

1 has also crossdressed 3 times, hid that side of himself, and is now jealous of #1. Not only because of #2's autonomy (which is a front for the true issue), but also because #2 gives me the quality time and emotional support that #1 refuses to give me (which I've said is a dealbreaker - #1 knows this and doesn't care, so I turn a blind eye to #1's behavior while he continues ignoring me and being self-absorbed).

My point:

Anyway - their whole jealousy debacle and #1's transphobia & internalized misogyny got me wondering - if other LGBT people are against transphobia, misogyny, and these stupid transphobic viewpoints about "I don't like men wearing dresses" (When the transphobes don't understand, so many of their heterosexual idols in Hollywood have also worn dresses in TV shows and films, seen and even praised by the whole world, but when trans people do it, it's condemned and not supported - which is obviously a disrespectful double standard).

I just wanted to call out the double standards of transphobia and misogyny, and start a discussion to see if anyone else feels the same way I do.