Hi my name is Max and I don’t know who else to ask about this. I have memories of my ex girlfriend ending her life in front of me about 4 years ago. But I found out it didn’t happen. I’m so confused. She’s alive, she’s well, but the memories are still there, still feel real, and now none of my closest Friends don’t trust me and I don’t know if I even trust myself. I have a long history of complex ptsd and trauma and I have autism. But I don’t understand, I don’t know even where to begin. My brains spinning. I have been grieving a traumatic death that never happened and I don’t know how to trust my self let alone or how to let any of my friends know what’s going on. Is this possible. How is this possible. Now that I know the truth the real memories are coming back in pieces and I just hate myself. The break up was a complete emotion damage and I haven’t dated since. But I don’t know why my brain made up these memories. Now the people I care about the most hate me and I don’t even know how to begin to explain what’s going on with me. I don’t even know what going on with me…what’s wrong with me