I can’t seem to make myself prioritize my health or life. All I’ve ever done was take care of others. That’s how I defined myself. It wasn’t happiness but fulfilling? Especially for loved ones.

But I never end up actually following through with what I need. I don’t understand why. I know what I need to do but I can’t.

I hate going to the doctor because it’s always the same answer of me not doing right and then chastising me.. when I already do.

I don’t take care of my mental health either. I’ll still be miserable in my everyday life so idk why I should bother. I just can’t see where I can find value in me without being a caretaker?