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Is Borderline Ace a Thing?
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I keep going back and forth as to whether I am ace or not... Going down this list from Asexuality Archive:

  • A strong desire to have sex with them.
    No, I don't. When I find someone hot, which I do, it's not sex that I want.

  • A strong sense that you want them.
    Yes. But maybe this is romantic attraction, not sexual attraction?

  • A electric spark or a lightning bolt.
    Not exactly... more confused by this one than anything. I'd describe it more like how your heart feels when having a deep religious/spiritual moment...

  • A strong desire to be physically close.
    Yes

  • A strong desire to do things involving genitals with them.
    Well, yeah, but maybe that's because I crave physical touch, and those parts are just more sensitive? Doesn't need to be sex...

  • A need to touch them.
    Need to me seems kinda strong and rape-y, tbh. Do I have a strong craving? For sure.

  • Everything they do makes you think of sex.
    Nope, not at all

  • A strong pull towards them.
    Yeah, sure.

  • Arousal at the thought/sight of them.
    Yes, definitely

  • A feeling that your rational mind is being overridden by downstairs.
    Usually no, but sometimes

  • A funny/good/warm sensation in the stomach.
    Yeah

  • Like there’s actually a magnet attracting you to them.
    Not really...

  • You want them inside you or want to be inside them.
    Definitely not. Just not something I think about

  • Feeling hungry for them.
    Sure, I'd say so.

  • Can’t look away and don’t want to be away.
    Yeah, definitely.

  • They become the only thing that matters.
    No, definitely not

  • Various “roar”, “wow”, “phwoar”, “aah-oooh-gah” noises happening in their heads and/or crotch.
    Yes, for sure.

As you can see (TL;DR), I mostly seem to be allo, yet at the same time, anything that is directly about sex is clearly in the "just don't really think about it" box. Definitely don't want to appropriate labels, which is why I'm hesitant to use the label, especially since I do experience something I call sexual attraction, but just don't know if what I'm experiencing is actually sexual attraction if it's not about sex, but it's not romantic attraction...

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Hetero-something

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5 years ago