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5'8, not fat, but not thin, super asexy

me as your cat maid

I drew a picture of myself because I’m shy and also a vampire. Ok I’m not a vampire, but I am super pale, never see the sun and like to live in castles. The colors are kinda off, but cut me some slack I only had the 64 crayon box I don’t have Jeff Bezos money and can buy the 128 color god box.

So I’m looking for someone 27 Plus from the US. I live in New York And I hate it here. No, I take that back, I hate the people here. The Area is fine, but I want to move to another place and hate the people there instead. Spread the hate! I’d like to move where my future GF lives so we can hate the people together. If one person hates their neighbors, they’re just an angry old man , if two people hate their neighbors it’s an HSA

I’m looking for someone who is funny, flirty, and fracking crazy. I call it the three Fs or FFF for short. So many people are boring. “Oh, you like music? I’ve never met anyone like that before.” Don’t ask me what my favorite “Hex Girls” song is, ask me how has music degenerated from the poetry of Hotel California” to what I presume is auto-tuned gargling from artist like Sia. Don’t ask me what my favorite Pokemon is. Ask me what Pokemon I’d marry If I was forced too. The obvious answer is Ditto that way they can Transform into Lindsy Lohan (side note: I have no idea who that person is I just know the name and probably spelled it wrong:P)

I guess I’ll share some things I like. I like to cook, I say this because saying you like to cook on a dating app is like saying “walk” to a dog. People become obsessed with you. But I do enjoy cooking. I made a red velvet cake with chocolate chips and white vanilla frosting. Nothing to major, but my mom who eats pretty much nothing but, cosmic brownies and McDonalds loved it so much she moaned. I have nothing else to say to that story. God help me

I like to make memes, play the piano, cast spells, day-dream and sleep dream. I’m an Alcohol virgin, don’t smoke, vape, or sniff, and I like too cross dress. I’m not exactly “manly” the M stands for “MMMMM I like potato chips”. You can wear the pants and I’ll be barefoot in the kitchen, lol.

I’d like a more dominant partner. It’s fun to be little spoon and someone needs to order food for me at restaurants. They always get me with their trick questions, making me look like an idiot.

Oh, and I don’t think I want kids. Just thought I’d get that all out of the way.

Anyway if you want to make a mistake and contact me go for it!