I don’t know if it’s my autism, my ocd, childhood trauma, some mix, but for some reason on a non logical level my brain directly links “loving” someone with being worried about them, and through this I’ve come up with something in my brain that says if someone doesn’t need to be cared for they won’t be cared for and worried over so if they aren’t worried and cared for then they don’t receive love , essentially saying if there’s nothing wrong with someone physically or mentally they won’t receive love and care

Illogical I know, i mean logically I can look at that and say it makes no sense, that people care no matter if it’s needed… But I somewhat rely on this , I determine if I’m romantically into someone based on how much I worry about them along with how comfortable I am around them, but like… I don’t think it’s necessarily normal to have this direct link between illness and love

Anyway uh I hope this is relivent enough , I couldn’t think of were else it would fit