My partner of 4 years is a closeted trans woman, and I am not able to have a romantic/physical relationship with a woman or femme presenting person. I am queer and have some attraction to women, but under VERY niche criteria and VERY rarely and only ever from a distance (due to childhood trauma)

I feel wrong that since they sort of half came out to me, my perspective has changed quickly. I absolutely love them no matter what with all my heart, and I am in full support and absolutely will stick by them because I of course love them and they’re my best friend!! But romantically and intimately, I feel a shift within myself, because well, I see them for who they’ve been hiding. And that’s a woman!

Even though they are still masculine presenting and haven’t touched on changing things yet, in hindsight, I can see things they’ve done/expressed through our 4 years that I overlooked that were very feminine/expressed gender dysphoria, and I see them in so much more of a feminine light now.

Am I wrong for already feeling a shift in my love dynamic towards them, even though they haven’t changed at all yet? I love them with my entire heart and soul, just as much as always and I forever will, but from a different angle now. From an angle where I can still see our future together, but as us being best friends.

EDIT - This got so much more traction than I expected omg, but thank you to everyone who has been so kind and understanding ♥️ this is a really big change for both of us, especially my partner. We’ll take things one day at a time, and I will definitely talk to them very soon and possibly post an update. I just really wanted to make sure my perspective wasn’t closed minded at all before taking the next steps, but I feel more confident now that everything will be okay!