I met someone a few months ago and the first date was truly magical and something special. Instant connection and vibes.

She even soon after said that she feels this will be for life. No one else has shown so much empathy towards me than her before.

Then after a point she started to become more withdrawn, not sending as many messages or not answering calls.

After 3 days she messaged me with "I feel something is pushing me away from you. I think it's my rejection fears being triggered and maybe something else. But I don't want to do this alone."

I sent her a reassuring message that she can feel safe with me and I have no intention of rejecting her, that I choose her for being her etc and will always be there for her.

She didn't respond again for a while, and perhaps out of a bit of anxiety (as this came out of nowhere) I sent her another message asking if there's perhaps another meaning behind her message, such as her not wanting to continue with me?

She then went ballistic. Accusing me of panicking and not having my emotions under control. And that she is not responsible to reassure me in my moments of fear and I should not have this expectation of her.

Went on to explain that her own happiness and personal evolution always comes first, and everything else is always secondary.

I tried to damage control this by trying ti simply talk about this as adults either on the phone or in person, but she wanted to have none of it; it seemed to have triggered her even more.

Then a few days later she sent me a text message late in the night (right before she goes to bed and shuts her phone down) that it's over and it's because "I didn't get her point" and that this is a deal breaker.

A few days later I messaged her asking if this is still her position and she said "yes, and it's not because I was running away from an emotionally healthy relationship, but because you gave into your fears, and I felt I would need to play a parental emotional role for you. we indeed had a very strong connection, but that in itself is not good enough".

It felt kind of visceral, especially, as imo it doesn't reflect reality. Me asking for clarifications on her initial short and cryptic message about "something is pushing her away from me" doesn't come across to me as immature or panicky. But what do you think?

Trivia:

- she believes in astrology, spirituality
- she believes that she is the reincarnation of Joseph Mengele

TL;DrR: Was by ex-gf just avoidant or did I mess things up by being too anxious?