I (31F) was in an amazing relationship. We had been friends for a while, and we got together in May, and I fell harder than I’ve ever fallen before. As a single mom, it was important for me to take things slow. I got scared in the beginning and we took about a month and a half to think and consider if we really wanted to pursue a relationship. They (32NB) didn’t want to be a parent, but I also didn’t want a coparent. I didn’t even want them to watch the kids ever. I’m just a real cautious type when it comes to that.

We had a whirlwind romance, and I thought we’d be together forever. On Halloween, we went to a party with some friends. I noticed that my partner was cozy with one of their older friends (28NB), someone whose house they stayed over at sometimes. I thought nothing of it at the moment. But there were a couple odd moments. At one point, someone mentioned polyamory, and I laughed and said that wasn’t my cup of tea. I get too jealous to handle that.

My partner’s friend looked at them and said “I thought you were poly.” My partner got flustered and backtracked, changed the topic. I thought nothing of it. That night, I had to work, and my partner spent the night at the friend’s house.

The next day, things were weird. We were texting, and the vibe was off. They said they needed to think things through and that they were just reevaluating life. Not taking it very seriously (they had been very vague), I still was getting worried. So I asked them to reassure me that they weren’t about to break my heart. Radio silence.

At which point I realized things were going downhill fast. Fast forward almost 24 hours of dead silence (a first in our relationship) and they said we needed to talk in person. We end up video calling and they tell me they “can’t do this anymore.” Ngl, at this point I was cold and distant—armor all the way on.

When I asked what happened, what’s going on, they mentioned fears over the election and their identity, and not wanting to hurt me. I reassured them that I was on their side. They seemed to hear me, but they were still crying a lot and upset. I chalked it up to anxiety and fear at the time.

We go back to being fine. Better than fine. We reassure each other, express how much it means to stand together in the hard times and support each other.

Tuesday (election day), everything is fine. We’re messaging like normal, my kid even sends a brief voice note saying hi, because she just wanted to say hi to my friend. My partner and kid exchange a few short messages.

Tuesday night at 9:38 pm EST I get the most Chat GPT, AI generated break up text I’ve ever seen. It says basically “this isn’t working for me, don’t contact me, goodbye.” I check my socials: blocked. Spotify playlists? Deleted. Even my partner’s family members had unfriended me. They became a literal ghost.

Dear reader, I have never felt the kind of pain I felt right then. My brain shuts down. For the next four days I keep looking down at my chest, expecting to see the gaping wound I felt.

On Sunday, I decide I need to get out of the house. There’s a walking tour of the city I decide to join. I walk up and I see our mutual friend, sitting on the steps, listening to a voice message.

The voice message is from my partner to the friend, sounding all lovey dovey. I’d know that tone anywhere. I feel sick, but the friend just looks up at me with an expression that could only be described as triumphant, and begins tapping happily away at the screen, grinning and smiling like a lovestruck fool.

Am I making a mountain out of a molehill? For days I ruminated on all the things I said, on my coldness in that first conversation. What could I have done that was so horrible that it deserved this reaction? Or was it them? Did something happen on Halloween night, and they were too cowardly to break it to me?