Ok I’ll try to keep this as short and simple as possible. While keeping the major details.

I(M30) had been dating my boyfriend(M36) for going on 6 months. I’ll admit we kind of rushed into things. We had great chemistry on everything. The first time we had sex dare I say it was the best I ever had.

About 3 months into it I had noticed a big change in his demeanor. I didn’t feel like there was any effort put forward by him. I tried to explain and express how it was making me feel multiple times. We stopped having sex. When I broke up with him on this last Monday it would now be 2 1/2 months without having sex. After a while it sort of makes you start to wonder if he was being satisfied elsewhere. But I trust him when he said he wasn’t. We had just so happened to start dating when a bunch of shit was going down in his life and making it hard for him to show up as a partner.

I stopped trying to fight for it and he noticed. I received this very well thought out and self aware text on how sorry he is for falling short as a partner and a lot of it had to do with drinking and partying to much and he would ease up.

The week after that felt great. Good communication, cute texts, still no sex but I wasn’t trying to push him.

Fast forward to last weekend. My oldest friend from childhood would be in town visiting with a bachelor party. I had been reminding my boyfriend for about 3 weeks they would be here. He assured me he would love to hangout with me and them. Friday comes around he tells me to let him know when I meet up with them. He said he wasn’t positive if he is going to go out because he is trying to save money. I text at 7:50 “hey babe, just got with the guys, we’re gonna be at these two places. No rush! Just lmk your plan”

No text till about 12:00 and he said he did something bad and ended up drunk at the casino. (So he went from staying in and saving money to drunk and gambling). Trying to brush it off and not make a big deal about it I say “No worries, would you mind if we join you” to which he replied “I’m leaving now, gonna change and meet up with you guys” (this man is always on his phone, so I know he read my message at 8:00 and chose to not reply, which makes me read that situation as “I didn’t want you here”about 1:00 I get a text saying he got pulled over and is so glad they didn’t take him in. (Safe to say he’s not coming). Saturday, I work all day and late so no big deal. Sunday morning I confirm with him after I drop of flowers to him at 10:30 am that he will be meeting up with me and my friends. On his counter that morning I see a plate with some party stuff on it. Which means he started really early or is still going from last night. Or two nights ago I have no idea. Regardless he said he’d meet me. 3:00 comes around and I reach out saying “Hey babe, we just got done with brunch we’re heading back to the air bnb now and we’re just going to be hanging out at the pool. No text back. It’s now about 1:00 and I myself am the one cross faded. I say “Hi babe, I’m drunk and a little out of it. I wish you were here. Sweet dreams I love you” No reply.

It’s now the next day 12:00 in the afternoon. Over 24 hours have gone by and call me weird but I don’t think you should ever ghost your partner for over 24 hours. With still no texts backs I’m genuinely starting to get worried now and say “I’m really confused on what’s going on, can you help me figure it out? What’s going on?”

To which 30 mins later he replies with “Nothing is going on, I have a migrane, you texted me at 1am. I called out of work.”

So I had to reach out AGAIN for you to say nothing is going on? And you made me look stupid twice in one weekend with friends here? And doing all that after you said you would be a better boyfriend? I was so mad that I didn’t even want to talk I just left a bag of his stuff and house key on his door and texted him from my car to tell him to grab it.

I genuinely loved the man and I feel guilty not even having a conversation about how pissed I was. But a. I didn’t wanna say anything I was going to regret and b. I couldn’t believe he would make me feel so unsafe I didn’t want to talk.