Though everything seems to be really good, I’ve been really struggling this year. Im going to grad school at a great school, working my ass off every day, have an amazing significant other in a long distance relationship, and a loving family. They are all thousands of miles away, and I haven’t made any friends that I feel like they would care if I disappear tomorrow - not suicidal btw, just a statement. Meanwhile my sanity is deteriorating from the feeling of vulnerability by virtue of the crime rates near my house and a lack of sleep. You expect your significant other to be the person who really gets you, but despite my willingness to do everything I can for their happiness, something came up today that makes me feel it wouldn’t be fully reciprocated. I know she’s amazing, but it hurts that I give so much to everyone and I don’t feel I can count on anyone for the same. Family has been on tense terms with each other for decades and I just want everyone to be happy, because I love them all and have a good relationship with each one. I feel like I’m being torn apart every which way.