I started drinking in 2019. Went from 4-6 beers once a week to binge drinking 8-12 beers once a week to binge drinking 10 beers 3-4 times a week to drinking 12-14 beers every night. I don't get drunk anymore or hungover. My best friend is seriously worried he's going to die soon of alcoholism and he drinks every hour and goes into withdrawal within 2 hrs with no alcohol.

He told me tonight that 12 to 14 beers a day is equivalent to a handle or 2 every few days. My ex nearly died of alcoholism at a handle every 3 days. He's been sober 10 years. I don't drink liquor or know alcoholic math. He told me he's worried about me and I'm drinking as much or more than when my ex was getting cirrhosis and his drs told him he would die if he kept drinking a handle every 3 days.

I know I need to quit drinking. I haven't been able to relax since 2019. My shrink is on my ass for years about the steadily increasing alcoholism. I don't like liquor and seldom drink it so I didn't know 12-14 beers a night was comparable to 1 handle every 2 or 3 days because I don't drink liquor.

In 2019 I could meditate and relax. My shrink says I reach for alcohol when stressed but I literally can't relax and haven't been able to relax since 2019.