When I was unemployed I had so much free time but it didn’t feel like it bc I was drunk and high constantly and spent most of it sleeping or getting fucked up. As one does. In like, my first couple weeks sober, someone told me, “you get all that time back now” and I just kinda thought to myself, “oh tht sounds like bullshit”.

I have 68 days sober, work long hours now, and have about 1.5 hour train ride each way to work. But I get home and have no clue what to do with myself other than shower and eat. On my off days, I basically marathon meetings (bc it’s hard to make in-person ones on my work days and zoom just isn’t the same for me). As soon as I leave the meeting or fellowship, I feel completely lonely and lost. Unless it’s awkward or weird, I always gotta be the last one there at fellowship because I just don’t know what to do after that. And usually I just go to another meeting.

When I’m not at meetings or work, I’m usually just vaping and watching reality tv or tiktok. Idk what to do. “Hobbies” seem like the obvious answer but stuff I’d like to do, like start painting again or learn guitar, require more money than I have at the moment. What do y’all do? I’m going through like an elfbar a day. I already read through the big book once and my sponsor told me to stop reading ahead.