I want to share in hopes this might help someone. I had to speak at a meeting tonight (even sought advice here). I had a great 15 min talk planned (an open discussion follows). Well life got in the way before the meeting (I have been over extending myself and trying to control things/do it my way these past two weeks and it caught up to me). I planned to talk about the "miracle" of the steps, as I am on step 12 and have been doing a lot of reflection on how much my life has changed these past 13 months.

Long story short, I walked in frazzled and not feeling confident about my share. My anxiety has been peaking all week because I have been slacking on my step 11. However, as anxious as I was feeling, I knew I had a job to do, and I also knew I was going to be ok and I was exactly where I needed to be. I incorporated my hot mess into my share, shed some tears (I've always been a crier and I am just accepting it), owned how I created my own anxiety, and expressded my IMMENSE gratitude for how much working the steps, the rooms, the people, have changed me. I don't know that I have ever been that vulnerable/real in my entire life to a room full of 40 people. I was a hot mess. A year and a half ago, I would have made up a lie to cancel and been two bottles of wine deep by the time the meeting started. The love and grace the room gave me was unbelievable. As one woman said "A good day where you don't drink is a good day. A bad day where you don't drink is a GREAT day". Life will still be life, but tonight was proof once again, that sobriety was and will always be the best decision I ever made.

I hope everyone is giving themselves grace, love and the fortitude to know that even on the bad days, you don't have to drink. It may take time, but the steps really do work, if you work for them. Grateful to be sober.