I've made posts here before about being afraid of nothingness after death and whatnot, however, between this and some other pages that discuss the afterlife I've become more comfortable with my mortality, though not because of my belief in an afterlife. After reading multiple posts I've become more ok with there being nothing after we die rather than an afterlife if it's like how these beliefs suggest. Not being able to experience things like eating, drinking, music (or at least more the music I'm into. I doubt that metal is a big thing in the afterlife if it's like how a lot of NDE's suggest it is), sex. Other things like soul contracts, reincarnation, the whole pre-life planning thing, etc.

While nothingness still scares me it falls in line with what I was hoping the afterlife would be like; a place where after a life of struggle and hardship you can finally have an eternity of peace. Preferably it would be in an afterlife where you can do whatever you want, live wherever you want, and maybe even create your own worlds (I dabble in writing and I would love to live in some of the worlds I've created). As someone who has struggled with crippling social anxiety and has JUST started snail like progress towards making my life better at the ripe age of 28, someone who is admittedly a very late bloomer, and as someone who has struggled with depression and been extremely close to suicide both in the past and very recently in these last few weeks the idea of coming back here for any reason fills me with dread.

I really hope that if there is an afterlife it is more of an eternal thing where the life you lived is one and done and you rest for eternity, otherwise I would just prefer nothingness because at least that way there is a finality to everything and we can all have our final rest even if it means the obliteration of our consciousness.