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am I really that traumatised?
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I have a myriad of mental health issues and want to get an idea of whether I really need to focus on the sexual abuse I endured by a family member 2 years my senior from when I was about 5-11yrs old and if that has traumatised me and had a lasting effect. the only thing I know is that I'm particular about being touched by other people even if family or friends and don't like sharing a bed. occasionally I dream about the abuse but I wonder if it's really affected me beyond that. obviously it's not great it happened but I'm mostly over it I would say. that said I should disclose I have suffered with anxiety since I was a child and was formally diagnosed with abnormal anxiety and severe depression in 2017 autum. Subsequently I was placed on antidepressants and had a psychotic manic episode on 2019 leading to a bipolar type one diagnosis. I have self harmed and have had ongoing suicide attempts since 2018. Depression is my biggest issue that weighs heavily on me and has disrupted my life incredibly. I've been unable to work consistently since 2018. I was further sexually assaulted brutally in 2019 by a male. I don't know if this post makes sense? does it resonate with anyone?

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2 years ago