I was watching a sitcom this morning and in it, there was a female author promoting her book "Principle or Petty?" The gist of it is that many things people do, believing themselves to be doing out of principle are actually just being petty. It's a sitcom, I realize, but I am the type of person who examines my own behavior and motivations because, hey, I'm not perfect.

I'm on a few dating sites, have been on 21 dates since February. Overall I'm a decent guy and I mean actually a decent guy, not some incel whining how women won't sleep with me all the while being creepy, stalkerish or a milk-toast kind of guy. I have a thing where I refuse to invest time in a woman who isn't interested in me --- because well, that lacks all self-respect. One of the cues I use to gauge mutual interest is communication. How often am I hearing from this person? I want to reiterate that I'm not one of those schmucks who expects an immediate response and then blows up if I don't get it. No, I think 2-3 days grace period is reasonable. If I send a message, I should hear back within 2 or 3 days at most. Granted, life happens and some weeks / situations it may be longer than that ... fine. But when it becomes a consistent pattern of several days between responses, I'm out. I make sure I've left the last message so I can't be accused of ghosting and I move on to the next one.

My reasoning is, of course "Principle". If her life is so busy or whatever that it never occurs to her "hey, I haven't heard from this dude, I wonder why? ... oh ... I never answered!" then well that tells me all I need to know. I don't want someone like that. Because I notice when I haven't heard from someone in a week. And on the rare occasions that it takes me days to get back to someone, I apologize for it. So I read it as disinterest on her part and I move on. I had one just this week where communication was consistent for several days, then basically nothing... kind of out of nowhere. I've been resolute not to message asking what's up because I left the last message.

So, women of Reddit am I standing on my principles or am I being petty? Is there some other perspective here I'm missing ... like some "well, if he really was interested he'd check on me" mentality or do I read it correctly as disinterest? Thanks!