Rant ahead.

Are we just fooling ourselves into believing that the ONE person who we marry will fulfill ALL of our desires in a partner?

When you think about that question, there will always be compromises no matter who you are with. After 15 years married to my wife, I am more tempted than ever before to step outside my marriage for a chance at something new. My wife is asexual and has never masturbated in her life. Our libidos don't match but she is aware of my desire to have more sex. She just doesn't feel the same way and I am trying to respect that but masturbation is no substitute for human intimacy. Long hugs, cuddling, feeling your partner's body orgasm, the after glow, making out, rounding the bases, oral sex, fingers... It's making me sad just typing out this list. LoL.

I think we can all agree that we grow as a person from new experiences. Some experiences are good, some are painful, others are just memorable due to the adrenaline rush, or maybe it was so boring that you will never do it again. In all cases, there are lessons to be learned and being stuck in the same routine teaches us nothing.

Does it make sense to cheat and have an affair at this point? The problem with affairs is they have no end-game. There will be a beginning but there will definitely be an end at some point (guilt or getting caught).

What about opening up the marriage to ENM? I would imagine that just lead to jealousy especially if the wife finds a Brad Pitt doppelganger or if the husband hooks up with Gal Gadot as their ENM partner by some stroke of luck.

I'm an INTJ so I tend to over think things but I can't help it 🙃. I'm risk adverse but at the same time I want to take more risks because of FOMO. Comments welcome. Maybe somebody can talk some sense into me.