I have many (female) friends with ADHD diagnosed as children or as adults but discounted the ways in which we were similar because they were always bouncy and distractable and loud and I don't really see myself that way. This year however I have been through a huge number of life changes, I changed career, moved abroad and had a baby. During COVID. All of my usual coping skills are out the window.

I had no trouble with school work growing up but would be constantly reprimanded for reading after completing my work, or continuing reading after we had changed topic and I didn't notice because I was absorbed, or not listening because they didn't have my attention when they started speaking.

Moving away for University and self-directed learning was a nightmare but I was diagnosed with anxiety which seemed to fit the bill and I did my therapy and built new coping strategies and got on with things. I met my partner who is incredible and supportive and he mediates communication for me and helps me keep on top of life admin. I know I have trouble with these things but I didn't think it was more than average, I just thought he was above average.

Suddenly 6 months after having my baby and finding it absolutely impossible to do anything at all except look after her and go to work I'm questioning things a bit. I did a pre-diagnostic quiz online and it asked weirdly specific questions I hadn't encountered around ADHD before "do you find yourself avoiding situations where waiting in line is expected and appropriate e.g. The supermarket" (that was the whole reason for the anxiety diagnosis - I was having difficulty going to the supermarket to buy food and wasn't eating, I get my food delivered now or use the self scanner) and instead of saying "do you always forget appointments" it said "you find it difficult to remember appointments" (I never forget because I know I find it difficult to remember and I set up a million reminders to be sure I go). It suggested I contact my healthcare provider about diagnosis.

Has anyone else had experience with being diagnosed following a major life change revealing that they had just learned to live with it? Is this likely or even possible? I have so much self doubt and I am very concerned that either it's just normal postpartum or if it is ADHD that it will be discounted as postpartum.