It's crazy. I'll be opiate free on July 4th, though I drink occasionally and I smoke weed daily. I know yall have conflicting opinions about using drugs that weren't my drug of choice... Not what I'm here to talk about.

I've gone several years without an action causing the addiction connection in my brain to automatically look around for my pill crusher... It was such a bizarre, almost out of body, slow motion experience.

I don't smoke cigarettes regularly anymore I vape, and smoke socially. but I'm the friend/stranger that always bums one, never buys their own smokes, because then they'll smoke through the whole pack in a day, and feel like shit. 🥴🤷🏻‍♀️ So tonight, I was planning on having a couple of drinks with some family (I actually only had one, to be honest; alcohol was never my thing,) and on a whim, I bought a pack of Marlboro menthol 100. Used to be my cigarette for YEARS.

I'm getting ready for bed, and when I did so in active addiction, I would take one last cigarette out, tuck it behind my ear, snort one last roxy, and head out to smoke one last cigarette. I pulled one from the pack tonight, and boom, flashback. I've had these smokes since I've been in recovery, too! Weird. So weird.

Anyway, writing a quick reddit post about it gave me plenty of time to ride the urge out instead of raiding my brother's medicine cabinet. Yall PLEASE stay safe out there, and always remember, there's a reddit community here who will love and support you through your cravings and urges! 💕