I managed to go quite a while without ever getting COVID, but I got it in July. I still have no idea where/when I could’ve gotten it because I’d barely been outside in the week leading up to it. I’m still dealing with the aftermath, as I developed telogen effluvium due to having COVID. For anyone who doesn’t know, TE is a form of stress related hair loss. My hair has been falling out in massive handfuls for about a month now. I’m obviously beyond thankful that I didn’t end up with any disabling symptoms of long covid, but it’s still been a bit devastating to cope with. I am disabled to begin with and I am very afraid of having life become any more difficult than it already is.

Anyway, I go to a large college, and in 100 person classes, I am typically one of the only people wearing masks. People around me are constantly sick, coughing and sneezing and blowing their fucking spit allllll over the place. Professors have stopped being as generous with allowing students to miss classes and make up work due to illness, so people are even less likely to stay home. I’m terrified of getting COVID again, and I don’t feel like me masking is enough to protect me when I’m exposed to this shit every day. I have to take public transportation to school, which is even worse because it’s insanely packed in the morning, so I’m just inhaling other peoples nasty breath the whole ride. Anything more than ten minutes on the bus ends with my crying and having a huge spike of anxiety. It all feels inescapable.

How do I cope with this and do my best to stay safe? I feel so hopeless. I miss online classes so much. I just want it to be over so I don’t have to live in such a miserable, anxious state five days out of the week.