Im the subject matter expert on my team. I work for an audit department. This means I’m the go to for everything that requires half a brain cell or more.

This year I’ve had death in the family, car accidents, been ill, and have been suffering from extreme depression and an inability to eat

The past month or so I’ve been overwhelmed at work due to lack of clear expectations. The only expectation I’m sure of is that I must find a way to do whatever is asked of me. Time frames are never clear, and tasks pile on (like most people are familiar with). As such, the minor things which frankly don’t matter but are all my boss understands have fallen by the wayside on some occasions for the sake of the meat and potatoes.

My boss has never praised me or anyone else. Does not know a single accomplishment of her employees because she does not understand the work we do. She got the position because she is friends with the director.

Instead of asking me if I’m okay, she berated me every moment she could over the past three days. Demanded screenshots of interdepartmental discussions to prove that they existed, and even texted me while I was making my wife breakfast demanding that I log on off the clock to correct a mistake I made.

To her credit, I have been making some really non-impactful mistakes on some quite useless tasks which, while they are required are mainly assigned so that she can say “hey did you do this?” (Sort of like making roofers wear hard hats at the top of the building just so the foreman can scream from the ground “hey where is your hard hat”). Nevertheless, instead of asking “hey, my talented and always eager to help SME is struggling, is he ok?”, she treated me like a piece of trash. I’m nothing but supportive and respectful. I defend her when people confide in me with the same complaints I’m making now. I tell them, she’s under pressure, she’s a good leader cut her some slack… but this past few days she made me feel like worthless trash.

If you’re a boss, don’t do what she did. I have led people before and I understand shit rolls downhill. But my method was always to assume when my best people are making mistakes that there is something wrong and they might need help. I only became domineering when it was clear that there was a lack of interest in the success of the team from those individuals, which I never assumed. I asked.

Now I am anxious and afraid at work and it is only making me timid and afraid to screw up. I don’t want to be there anymore. But I love my job. Im really good at it. Im just heartbroken because the only person who doesn’t think so is my boss. And whether or not she knows dick about what we do, she holds the keys to the rest of the kingdom

What can I do? She and I had words yesterday and scheduled a meeting to hash things out on Tuesday. I am nervous about what ti say. But I feel like she should know that the entire team has confided in me and told me the same thing I’m telling you. I did not solicit their feelings. They have all told me in one way or another since she took the position. Now it’s coming to a head and I want her to know the team Lives in a self loathing fear that she has produced. Not to make her feel bad but to force her to look in a clearer mirror

Just wanted yo vent

Tired of giving my all for this company when this person is allowed to treat people like turds